E-Z to the B-Z = Game of the Yeezy?

7/14/07- Sentinel Wire Services

Looking to build on his last outing, Ravi took on Bryan in a Day of Debuts at the Schoolhouse.

Edgar, obviously needing a few extra months to recover from his embarrassing, infamous Finals Forfeit, finally began his 2007 season on MZAs team, along with Eazy Ezra. Bryman was backed by Ryman and Murder was the Case, excitedly making his first appearance at an FHSS stickball event. Caseys Cackalacki homey Dylan The Chillin Villain served as official.

Ravi fell victim to three unearned runs in the first, but was pitching well through three due to a new technique of extreme batter ice-grilling of up to ten seconds before each pitch, building on the once-successful strategy of the legendary Hidalgo Glick. However, MZAs old nemesis The Fourth Inning would soon arrive (along with the Bizman), and the former would prove much more damaging.

Six of the first seven batters trotted freely to first before Joinah torched an earned salami. Three walks and two singles later, Ezra performed E.R.R. (Emergency Ravi Relief) for the second time this season, adding the classic Taylo-tage move of allowing all inherited runners to score before closing out the inning.

Bryan, meanwhile, secured the first out of the game on a popout and recorded the remaining nine outs on Ks. Ed was not one of those outs, but Ravis slump continued to be Deep Deep Trouble as he went hitless in four ABs as the Beantown Bombah won in five going away, 15-0.

Impressive once again in short relief, Ezra looked to extend himself, teamed with Ryan, Bryan and Dylan against Biz, Ed, Ravi and Casey. It looked to be a good matchup on paper, but no one could have predicted just how good.

Eazy E quickly erased all doubts about his stamina as he matched Biz inning for inning. Goose eggs were flying so fast and furious, Rachel Ray could have made a dozen omelettes. Both teams were as nonthreatening as a pre-Chappelles Show Wayne Brady, and Biz was in fact carrying a no-hitter through six.

Cannotar, as is his wont, would break up the no-no mere moments after Bryan emphatically pointed out its existence, but Biz shrugged it off like dandruff. Prior to the bottom of the inning, Ezra made the mistake of asking how many walks he had allowed- to that point, none- and promptly walked four in the inning, giving Biz a tenuous 1-0 lead.

Dylan stroked his first hit in the eighth but would be stranded on first. Moments later, Biz jumped all over a curve for a laser of a triple that Ed followed up with an opposite-field double to plate a run. Up 2-0, Biz would have no shenanigans, bookending a walk to Bryan (who literally sat down with the count 3-0) with two Ks to complete the two-hitter.

Edgars quest to hit 1.000 ended early this season, as he went 3-5. MZA continued to wander aimlessly in Cant-Hit Land, while Casey remained as laid back as Snoop Dogg would be in the presence of gin and juice. Biz credited his strong performance to the introduction of a differently-gripped Straightball to complement his Straightball, as well as exactly one changeup.